Team Bonding, Round One

Tonight was a living-the-dream-at-college kind of night. Some of the girls and boys from my ward got together and played "tunnel soccer" in one of the many tunnels on campus. It was like indoor soccer, but it was open on the ends...because it was in a tunnel...yeah, you understand. It was so much fun, mostly because most of the people in the group actually took it seriously, but there was a great balance between competitive and playful. After we faced an extremely unfortunate loss, we ran through the sprinklers on a hill near the dorms and slid down the hill like a Slip 'n Slide. I can't explain how much fun I had; I was cracking up and grinning like a little kid the whole time. We made this bond, just in one night, and I can't wait to see what the rest of the year brings. I'm so grateful that I am able to be in a ward with these amazing people, and experience college at this incredible university. I am constantly surrounded by beauty, friendly people, and the assurance that I have made so many right decisions that have led me to where I am right now. I literally cannot wait for the adventures that lie ahead of me.

Attention!

I am weirdly uptight sometimes. I let things bother me that really shouldn't bother me. I dwell on stupid things that I should honestly just get over. I hate it because I feel like people sometimes think that that's just part of who I am; it's expected that I will be uptight about some things. And I just hate hate HATE that. Even this post testifies to the truth of that (ha, I'm such a Mormon) -- I'm getting uptight about being uptight. OH MY GOSH, WHY CAN'T I JUST BE NORMAL? WHAT'S WRONG WITH ME?

Okay, that last part was a joke. I'm not really that dramatic, I promise.

Rather, look forward. And find joy in each step of the way.

I know what my problem is lately, though. I have been absolutely horrible about reading my scriptures and making my morning and evening prayers a priority. It's horrible, and I feel it constantly throughout each and every day. It will change though, and it will change tonight. I know with all of my heart that once I start doing those things regularly again, I will be happy. Coupled with that knowledge is the fact that my floor is awesome. I just spent some quality time with some girls in my hall, and we just laughed and talked about random things and just had fun sitting there and getting to know each other. I'm making friends! Already! And it is an awesome feeling.

Things are about to become great in this journey I call life.

Orientation-ated

Yes, that is a word.

Freshman orientation is OVER! As much as I learned, and as many cool people that I met during the first few days, I am sort of done with being herded around campus in little groups like sheep. I am really glad I took advantage of orientation and made some new friends and got to know the campus and mission of BYU better. I have this incredible feeling every time I walk around campus; I am finally, really a college kid. I am going to be living in a dorm with my very best friend in the world, and I am surrounded by people who share the same values as me. As hard as it was to say goodbye, I am finding that I am ready for this year, and I am ready to do the very best that I possibly can. My experience at BYU will be based on what I put into it, and just how much I am willing to sacrifice. I know that if I let myself, I will grow immensely and be able to discover who I am and what my purpose is.

This is all great and awesome and true, but my eyelids are heavier than I can possibly explain, and I'm going to fall asleep any second now. Tomorrow--night on the town experience from last night and list of goals and ambitions for this year.

Goodnight!

Long Time, No See

Well, it looks as though I may have slacked a little bit on my blogging. And when I say a little, I mean lookIhaven'tbloggedinovertwomonths. It's kind of sad - to think, I was so excited to post daily about my adventures, and document the days as they passed so I wouldn't forget them. I really wish now that I would have; though if we're being honest, some of my posts would have been pretty angry, considering the struggle that was my job. As much as I love kids, I had many hard days. But, I can't dwell on the should-have- or could-have-been's, I must look forward.

Looking forward. What an interesting concept. This blog that I started in the beginning of the summer started with a post about Graduation. It honestly and truly feels like I graduated years ago. I feel like so much has happened since then, when it's really only been three months. After Graduation, I did a lot of "looking forward," as it were. During the school year, I could not wait to get out of high school and move to Provo. After I graduated, I sort of saw college as a looming presence in my life, though it still seemed like it was some what far away. This is where I currently stand: I leave for school in roughly 57 hours. If we're being honest, that is not far away at all. To put it simply, I am staring college right in the eye. It's crazy and weird and scary and exciting and promising and new and unknown and interesting and every other adjective that works in this situation. I feel almost apathetic; it really hasn't hit me. There are moments when I am so excited I can hardly contain myself, and moments when I feel like curling up in a ball, hiding, and letting myself cry and think about all of the things I'm going to miss. There are a lot of things that I am going to miss. I'm in this weird place where even though I'm busy, I often feel like there is not much going on. And since I have not yet gotten to school, all I really have to think about are my memories, and the fact that the life I love here will simply go on without me. It's just so hard to picture myself sitting in my dorm room with my best friend, when I drive by my old high school almost everyday and think about the Cross Country season that started already  (without me), and the Homecoming assembly and parade that will be happening in a few short weeks (without me). On the same note, however, I will be at BYU in three days. In three days, I will have all of my crap moved into my new room, I will be checking in and getting a student ID and trying to memorize the map before I start wandering around looking lost. I will literally be having the time of my life, and though I can't really see that yet, I know that it's true. It's really going to happen. And it's going to be amazing.

I decided I don't want to miss out. I want to do all that I can without drowning in life, and I want to do it all the very best that I possibly can. I don't want to be on the outside of anything; I want to let myself live and have fun and study hard and be successful, darn it! I know that college will be all that I think it will be and more. I guess, even though I don't really admit this to people, I'm a little bit scared. No, I really am scared. But I know that I am in good hands, and I know that everything that is meant to happen will happen. I want to record it all, I want to remember the good times and write about all the crazy things I feel. I want to remember people, places, events...everything. This ol' blog will certainly come in handy. I need to clean and pack, and really buckle down. This is happening.


Look out, all you Mormons. I'm comin' for ya.